


Oh, My Ice Heart Bleeds

by JaneAlpha



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Death, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-12
Updated: 2016-07-12
Packaged: 2018-07-23 01:53:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7461945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneAlpha/pseuds/JaneAlpha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki needs help. Tony won't be there to watch his frozen evil heart emerge again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oh, My Ice Heart Bleeds

The walls were bright white, garish to the eye of an Asgardian damn painful to the recently awoken. He was laying on a bed with a light sheet half covering his near naked body. He pulled the sheet up to try and guard himself from the chill. Reaching for his magic so that he might at least clothe himself he was not surprised to find it blocked. Had S.H.I.E.L.D finally discovered a way to rob him of his siedr? Or was this his fathers doing.

He didn't move, he daren't, he just waited for what must of been hours staring at the ceiling trying not to remember why he had ended up here. His own fuck ups. His own greed. His owns fears. His own naïveté. Finally the door creaked open omitting the last man he wanted to face.

"I thought you might want some clothes," Tony crept into the room placing them on a chair next to the door. "Just a shirt and pants but I thought it might like to spare your dignity."

Loki sat up trying to catch Tonys eyes. He doubted the man believed he could ever regained his dignity "Was it terrible?"

"Yes." To his surprise Tony laughed. "I'm not sure I'll be there next time."

"Tony, this is the last..." He held up a hand to hault Loki's movements as he tried to gather his strength to reach the man.

"Stop, Loki. Not this time." He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "Not again."

"This is the last time." He was was cracking... Raw.

"You said that last time. And the time before that. Do you even remember how many times you've been here?" His lover was exasperated. They'd had this conversation before.

"Three. First after the Chitauri - then twice more." He looked down ashamed of his actions.

"Eleven Loki. This is the eleventh time you've gone off the rails." He sat down heavily in the chair which held Loki's clothes. "I can't take it anymore. Nate can't take it anymore."

"Nate?" He recognised that name didn't he? Knew that name. 

"Yes, Nathandral, he can't be subjected to this anymore." Tony clarified.

"I don't... I don't know who that is." Loki frowned shaking his head slightly as Tony whipped his head up. 

"You don't... Loki, Nate's our son."

"Son?" He had been far gone then.

"Yes he's four. You don't remember him?" Loki shook his head. "You've experience memory loss before but you've never forgotten Nate."

"I can't remember him. I can't remember what I did." But he could remember him. When he closed his eyes he saw the boys face. He was choosing not to remember... Not yet.

"That's why I can't let you do this anymore. Thor's going to take you back to Asguard. He's begged the Allfather to allow you to see healers; mind healers." He cleared his throat. "They don't think it's going to be a short treatment. Years, Loki, you won't be able to return for a long time - if at all."

"And your not going to come with me?" He doesn't know why he asked. He knows the answer. He closes his eyes again and sees the Black Widows broken body at his feet.

"This is something you have to do on your own." Something that Tony refused to do with him. Refused to see that side of him; refused to believe he was still that person. Refused to acknowledge the evil that live inside him. The icy cold that coiled around his blue heart.

"Our son is to stay here with you?" His Nathandral. His beautiful child whom he loved. He lived for... Whom he would kill far. His clenched fists where ice cold and he knew that Tony saw the blue tinge.

Tony nodded. "Thor will bring him to visit once the bifrost is completed. He's a little young yet for his Uncles form of transport."

"This is cruel Tony. Why didn't you have Thor take me before I woke. Instead you dangle yourself and our child just out of reach before your taken away forever." He made another galant effort to move towards the man but he knew his knees would buckle as soon as they took his weight.

"Loki, there's something else - you're pregnant. Shield confirmed it. Your to have the baby here and then Thor will take you." The man looked away. Guilty shadows hid in the depths of his eyes.

"You'll take the baby from me?" Loki's hand clutch his stomach. "My son and my baby wrenched from me by my lover - my life partner."

"Your Husband! I am your Husband. Loki believe me I have love you; I'll always love you." Tony looked deep into his eyes and made a small move towards him before thinking better of it. "But you are not the man I love - not all the time anyway and we can't treat you here. Hell, even the Asgaudians don't know how to treat you yet." He shook his head helplessly taking a step back to the door.

"Perhaps I should be sent to Jotunheimr! Send the monster back to his fellow monsters!" Loki screamed eyes flashing red. "Maybe that's Thor's plan to finally get rid of me. The family embarrassment." Loki turned his head back to the ceiling. 

"Thor loves you more than you could ever know but whatever's wrong with you will always drive everyone from you." Tony fiddled with his ring pulling it off and leaving the platinum ring on the side table. "Your heart is infected with an evil that creeps into my dreams a scares me more than anything else in this earth."

"May I see Nathandral. Just once before I leave." He resigned himself to the fact that the man was lost from him.

"Loki. Close your eyes and remember what you did." He did as he was asked. He would do anything now to make his situation less unbearable.

The Black Widows body lay broken and bloodied her neck clearly broken from the impossible way which her head lay. Dead eyes staring into his face. Glee. Pride. Accomplishment. The his face turned to the other rooms occupant. A young green eye child, who was pale, beautiful, and horrified. The ice around his heart melted then as he collapsed to the ground. What had he done? 

When he opened his eyes again Tony Stark had gone but the wedding band remained. His son was lost to him and that moment he realises it will replay itself everyone he closes his eyes. 

Fin

**Author's Note:**

> Found this in some unfinished work on my phone so finished it off for your angsty pleasures!


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